Monday, August 18, 2014


Sometime in the last two years, I made myself a list. It wasn't a normal grocery list or a to-do list. It was a list of things that I felt I had been failing at in my personal life. Things that I sucked at. Things that I thought I could be doing better. It was all of my personal misgivings neatly stored together as one little note on my phone.

I'm ashamed to say that it wasn't that long ago that I deleted that list from my phone.

It's easy - perhaps because I'm a woman or perhaps merely because I am human - to begin a cycle of self-loathing. Mine often begins with the way I look and spirals into hating myself for everything that I am incapable of or doing less-well than someone else.

It's frustrating, isn't it? To live in a society that makes the definition of who you are dependent on what you look like and how much you weigh. Even more frustrating because we give in to it. I give in to it.

I'm working on it, on the one hand. I'm working to eat right and train right. And that's great and it's important. But I think the more important part is changing my mind. Changing the way I view myself. Changing the way I view others.

I wish we could change the saying to "Living up to your potential is the new skinny" or "Doing the best you can is the new strong."

But then again, that's quite a few more words, isn't it?

Wednesday, August 6, 2014


This last Saturday, I spent my evening in Baltimore watching the Baltimore Orioles play the Seattle Mariners.

Holland was supposed to go with me, but ended up having to stay in Austin, so I went with my good friend David and met up with a bunch of people we know here who also attended the University of Washington.

We stood for most (but not all) of the game behind the visiting team's bullpen. This meant that we got to watch any of the Mariners' relief pitchers warm up before they went in. Luckily for us, the Mariners put in a lot of relief pitchers that night so we were able to see a few go through. We saw Brach, Maurer, Furbush, and Rodney (I think that was it...) They were really nice and would wave to us every now and again. They even threw some bowls toward some people standing above (but not AT them...).

There's not much else to say besides MARINERS WON.

Camden Yards was beautiful and we were glad to see an Ms win!

4th of July

I know that there are a few thoughts rolling around the heads of those reading this blog. Here's what I am guessing they are:

1. "It's already the 6TH OF AUGUST. How have you not blogged about this already?"

To which I would say, dishonor on you for thinking so negatively. I have at least a year to get posts up about life-changing events like the CELEBRATION OF OUR INDEPENDENCE. Dishonor!

2. "You couldn't come up with a more creative title than 4th of July?"

No. No, I couldn't. So sue me.

Anyway, the weekend started off fairly eventful. Our friend, Derek, had planned another trip to DC for the holiday weekend (his second trip to DC over the 4th, if you're counting). He was supposed to have a layover in Philadelphia and then land around 6 something at BWI.

I took a half day at work so that I could drive down to the BWI area before traffic really hit hard and do some shopping while I waited for his plane.

This is where things start to get fishy.

As I'm running out of store options, I learn that Derek's flight has been delayed. He says I should just eat dinner without him because he doesn't know when it's going to arrive. The reason behind these delays, they say, is thunderstorms in Baltimore. I am in Baltimore. There ain't no thunder...

Anyway, I eat dinner and wait to hear back from Derek about his flight. I'm also texting Holland because he is supposed to fly in that night too from Austin. His flight is also delayed; though, not as severely as Derek's.

Derek goes through a series of delays before they finally tell him that all flights on the East Coast from Philadelphia are canceled/grounded.

Luckily, I had already started to prepare myself for the scenario and had mentally prepared myself for the 2 1/2 hour drive to the Philly airport. I bought myself some Walmart sweats, some snacks, and made sure I had enough money for the diabolical tolls we would hit along the way and I was off.

If I remember correctly, I picked Derek up around 10. He loitered around the car for a bit while I went to use the ladies room and then we were headed back to DC.

And thus began our weekend. We spent the weekend watching awesome (but not awesome) movies (Non-Stop with Liam Neeson and Transformers 4 or whatever number it's not now), making peach cobbler, seeing the Botanical Gardens, and doing fourth of July-y things.

Botanical Gardens
Since Derek had never been downtown to see the lights, we decided to brave the crowds. We actually got a really good seat near the Lincoln Memorial and settled in for about an hour playing Uno and eating pie (America!) before the fireworks actually started. They were some of my favorite to date.

Before Derek left on Sunday afternoon, we stopped to get brunch. I've never met a brunch I don't like.

Thanks, Derek, for being our most constant visitor. We love having you here and want you to come ALWAYS.

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Captain America

I was going through notes on my phone - things that I've written down to remember for later, songs I want to get, books I want to read, quotes I want to remember, recipes, etc - and I found a quote that I told myself I would blog about later.

Later is NOW.

As a back story, Holland and I were driving around DC one afternoon, reminiscing about trips that we've taken. We went back to one of our first trips here in DC when we went down to see Mark run his marathon in NYC. (See post here.) On the way back from NYC, we stopped in Philadelphia to get a quick run down of the history. We were taking a tour of Independence Hall. Here's what I wrote from my initial recap:

"At one point, she was telling us about the birth of our Nation and she goes, "And THIS was the day that America was born," and then she got REALLY quiet. I think she was trying to let it all sink in. Holland took this silence as something else. He thought she was waiting for our response, so what does he do? He goes, "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" That's right. My husband cheered for the birth of America. Our tour guide was surprised at the outcry, but I think she appreciated it. We sure did."

As Holland and I were talking about this moment, Holland gave me a golden quote:

"The REAL question is why was I the only one cheering? Does no one love America?"
 and then:
 "Apparently, there was only one patriot in that room. Oh wait, two. Me and the lady telling the story."

Okay, Captain America, okay.

Thursday, July 10, 2014


Listen, you guys. I'm going to be honest - which I try to do as much as possible which often leads to me not saying anything so as to not lie.

I digress.

I've kind of been a grump lately. And I have my reasons. Trust me. I have a lot of complaints. Let's just start with this week.

  • I had a dentist appointment. Blech.
  • My dumb smart phone drove me halfway around the city today trying to get to our softball.
  • Not one, but TWO softball games were rained out this week.
  • On that note, after my dumb smart phone drove me halfway around the city and I got to my softball game, I hit one (a pop-up, of course. Sigh.) and then the game was called due to rain.
  • Our AC was broken for most of the week. One night, it was hotter in the house than it was outside. 
  • The week has been DRAGGING so slowly.
And that's not even counting how sick I am of H traveling for work. Listen. (Listen, Linda, honey, listen... Have you seen this video?) I think that spousal travel goes in waves. The first couple weeks, you're like "Yeah, I'm awesome. I don't need a man. I can be a bachelorette. I'm rocking this. I can do whatever I want." And then that first giant spider crawls out from who knows where it had been hiding when the nominated spider-killer in the house is gone and you're done. You know? But really, it's not about the spiders. The first few weeks - easy. And then you just get kind of sick of it. And I'm pretty sure that after you're sick of it for a little bit, you just kind of get used to it and put on your big girl panties. But right now? I am SICK of it. And I'm sick of being responsible for everything. And cleaning. OMG. I have considered becoming a hoarder because I just don't want to clean anymore. Is that wrong? Because if it is, I don't want to be right.

Anyway, I complain about all of this only to say that I know I shouldn't be complaining. I should stop being a frumpagrump. I have a good life. We're part of the DINK (double income, no kids, I just learned) community which means we have A LOT of freedom. We were this close to jetting off to Vegas this weekend (oh - that's another negative - no Vegas!). We're considering taking a series of mini-road trips in September over the weekend. And we can do that. That's pretty awesome.

I have an awesome apartment. I have good friends. I have a great husband who is HOT (I know because I was staring at pictures of him yesterday). Not only that, he is so supportive, not only in his job making the big bucks, but of the goals I want to pursue. 

My life is awesome. Seriously. And I am grateful. But sometimes, I just struggle.

I struggle to write things like this. I have a hard time knowing where the line is between being honest and being too negative. Is being negative too honest? But at the same time, I don't want to portray this image that I've always got it together or that I'm always happy (HA. Fat chance of that thanks to THIS phenomenon).

Anyway, hats off to the close of this week (soon!) and to the beginning of a new one, with hopefully a better attitude.